Why write a bucketlist?

20131222_162729

Ok not that I like to indulge into controversy but I have been thinking for while now after having my own first bucket list (bucketlist 2013)  last year. And this year also I was initially not keen to make one but then I end up writing a few things in it (bucketlist 2014). I was thinking this year if I do need a bucket list or not. Why bucket list? This was the question I asked myself last year as well before writing my list. Well I read some stuff on this as well where I saw both pros and cons of having a bucket list. Some says its good to write down the things you love to do in order to prioritize them in life. Others says it can sabotage you or can make you a tourist and not a traveller if you just do the things in your list all the time.

I was amazed how strong people’s opinion was about the term called bucket list. Ok let’s give it a new name then first to disassociate the bucket that looks like a limitation first of all that can only fit few things at one time. What would you call chasing your dreams and do things that make you happy? I don’t think we ever do anything in terms of bucket list that makes us feel miserable or unhappy right? So the key is happiness, sense of achievement and over all it’s a positive change that it brings in your life. I don’t want to associate it with death either as that’s the worst thing I can do to associate it with fear of dying one day. So I won’t call it a ‘things to do before I die’. I don’t want the name ‘to do list’ either as it should not be forced upon me just because I want to do these things doesn’t mean I have to pressure myself into doing it as that would cause more stress than happiness. ‘Wish list’ is not bad but not quiet appealable still.

Any ways the reason to write few things to do that makes you happy are many like:

  1. As humans we are quiet prone to laziness and just do whatever we do in our daily life the same way and become a bit robotic and get into our automatic gear to run our life
  2. We are not conditioned socially to think about our well being and happiness usually
  3. We are accustomed of thinking in terms of what is right and good in terms of the rules of society
  4. There are times that makes us think that we are not happy but then we start the blame game rather than changing something in our life
  5. Also we are prone to associate our happiness with the tangible things a lot of time (example: money which is basically a tool to do things in life that are either necessary or important but we start giving more importance in hoarding the money till death do us apart).
  6. We have so many mundane activities in day to day life that takes precedence and we loose focus on the important things in life
  7. It’s hard for us to prioritize things if we don’t have the focus around the important things
  8. Our brain is conditioned to use the data in form of list better than the random chunks of information or goals
  9. We are so used to of making a to do list in our head that anything similar gets done quickly or more clearly

But now that we understand that this particular list (or a new name that we would give this list soon) is important in order to focus on the important things in life what we are not supposed to do:

  • This list is important but it should not stress you so much that you become upset or unhappy otherwise you loose the whole essence of having such a list
  • With time our priorities and goals change as well as our likes and dislikes hence its important to revisit your list every now and then
  • Don’t attach yourself to the list that not doing something from the list makes you dishearten at any time
  •  Don’t think that not being able to do something on the list is the end of the world as it is not
  • Make sure you remember the reason you have a list – to make you happy. So anything on the list that you think is going to make you unhappy try to find a better item in its place
  • It’s your list so don’t come under social pressure to complete anything on your list. Take your own pace and do it as you like not by the fear of what others would think. It’s your list and you can do whatever you want with it – change it, do it, cancel it whatever.
  • Try to bring the balance of different kind of things on your list to make sure the start doesn’t discourage you and you always have the variety to choose from. For example: If you want to make abs then don’t obsess about it so much that you kill your self on the gym floor. Try to understand that having things on your list doesn’t make them magic items that can be done any quicker than their normal time. I had a item saying I want to run marathon whereas I had never run in my whole life for even 5 k. So I didn’t do it last year and training this year for obstacle course which is helpful to increase my stamina and also if I would like then I would run a marathon one day that too only in case I think I would enjoy it.
  • Don’t have a list that you think would make you look cool in front of others but also think of the reason why you

At last but not the least do remember that you create a bucketlist to achive more and to be happy in life and the moment you start getting streesed due to it that means a problem and you need to start thinking why you had it in the first place.

Hope you have fun with or without bucket list doing things that you love my friend.

Guinness book of records & Date a stranger – Bucket list items for 2014

Now this was something I wouldn’t have thought last year really but after attending a seminar (100 things – http://100things.com.au) from Sebastian, I was all ready to give it a go. I was just looking for the events on that weekend and this event for biggest blind dating came up with the highlight of Guinness book of records. I was not quiet sure about this kind of event but at the same time it looked like fun so I was willing to give it a go at least to get the record and have another item ticked off my bucket list. Finally I booked it. It was a decision made in 10 minutes that too for the very next day. I was the last woman to book the last ticket as after that no more tickets were available in female category.

Anyways I was excited for the event but at the same time I was a little nervous as I had never been on such a blind date where I had no clue whom I might meet. I just hoped to meet some one I can at least have a decent conversation if nothing much. So there I was all ready and dressed up for my mysterious date. I put effort into getting ready by going home early and wearing one of my best dresses and it was not just because I was on a date but also because the event was organized in Opera house, the iconic building of Sydney where I had only been once so far. So it was going to be a really exciting event I thought. And being single is awesome for many reason out of which one is this where you can experiment with things like this. So there I was outside Opera house in my heels and holding my clutch. There was a really huge queue now to get to the door. People were dressed to the nines and a lot of them nervous and excited about it like me. I with others started to line up but as per the invitation the doors were supposed to be closed in half hour and then they would choose some random people from the bar if someone didn’t make it. So now this got me a bit nervous as I didn’t want to waste my money and loose the opportunity to hold the Guinness book record. And guess what, when you are keen to do something then some time you end up doing silly things. Of course I did hate the fact that I didn’t collect my ticket earlier which would have been way more easier. Some girls were going straight in which made me curious to see if there is another queue that people are not aware of. So I started to follow these girls but soon to my dismay I realized that they had already collected the tickets. Now I had lost my position in the queue/line and I was almost at the ticket window. I decided to stay there as long as it takes to get the ticket rather than going back again. Hence I pretended that I am also in the queue and end up meeting a stranger and now friend there in the queue who also jumped the queue like me. We both had a good conversation for a short period of time before we had to go and take seat near our pre-designated table. Now the tension started building up as people starting gathering around their designated areas inside Opera house. But the view was beautiful so I preferred to enjoy the moment and took some canapés on the way and a glass of water to enjoy the ambience in this iconic building. People had started introducing each other in order to be more comfortable in room full of strangers. I took some pictures to capture this event in my camera as this was more of an adventure for me rather than dating I must say.

Soon the area was full of people holding wines/beer and other drinks in their hands and eagerly waiting for their blind date. I was a bit nervous by now thinking who is going to be my date. And there the moment comes when I am introduced to my date. Ok now I was not expecting to be setup with a fellow Indian that too with whom none of my criteria matched that I was asked to fill in the website by the company (CitySwoon) organizing this event. Anyways I didn’t want to rude with the guy so we started talking formally but it was very clear that it was not going anywhere and soon I started discovering that he hadn’t made any effort to come here today and directly rocked up from him work with a backpack on his shoulder that made him look like a school kid and not so cool. And also it became unbearable to talk to him soon when I realized he had really bad breath (Some people don’t realize that even if it is a blind date but one needs to put some effort to get ready and at least eat some mint if you have bad breath). Personal hygiene is yours but if you are in someone else’s company than it affects others as well. After some formal chit chat it was a matter of spending one hour in order to break the record to be honest and we both knew this. He was interested in hooking up with a blonde with no sense of self appearance and I was hoping to meet some one who could at least hold an intellectual conversation or may be a bit attractive. So this date was a complete disaster for us. Anyways time didn’t really fly but somehow one hour was over and we were allowed to mingle with other people. But I think I had enough of this and on my way out I did talk to some more people before winding down for the day.

Good news is that we did break the record in spite of a bad date that night. So there it goes – two items on my list are completed with this (date a total stranger and hold a gunnies book record).

 Don’t take me wrong and may be blind date can be fun but I am not sure if I ever want to try it again based on my only personal experience. But it was fun trying anyways.

My first house party in Australia and another item on my bucketlist

Yes that was something I always wanted to do as I love inviting people over dinner sometimes. But this time I wanted to throw a proper house party where all my friends can come and I get to meet them all at the same time. And we all have a good time. It was my birthday that made it possible for me to invite all of them over for a party. I was nervous as I had a race the day before the party and to be honest I have never catered these many people at once in my life. When I was little my mum and dad used to organize such parties on my birthday and heaps of people used to come but as I grew it was moreover with couple of friends somewhere in the restaurant or pub where I would celebrate my birthday and even a quiet one sometimes. I was never a big fan of birthdays since I grew up for some reason. But this year, it was a blast and I felt like it was Christmas to be honest as it was going on for a week almost starting from the weekend before when I flew to Antarctica and then on my birthday I had some ice cream at work with my colleagues and then a beautiful home cooked 4 course meal at my friends place. Then the next day my another friend took me for dinner as he couldn’t make it for my house party and after two days my house party. So it was like Christmas for me really to celebrate my birthday this year that I would never forget. I love my life for many reasons and my friends are one of the biggest reason 🙂 So the day had come and I had done a lot of shopping the other day and that was another adventure in a way to buy so much stuff and realizing that my flatmate can’t drive me home so I had to push the trolley all the way to my home for 20 min and then back and it was quiet honestly a struggle to keep the trolley on the same track all the time and I did have some workout during that 🙂 Anyways I was a bit tired after preparing the sangria and the big shopping on Saturday so I prepared some stuff overnight and left rest of the things for Sunday morning (party day). I woke up on time and start cooking for the party as I wanted to serve some Indian dishes. As suggested by one of the friends, I had asked everyone to bring one dish looking at the number of people that would be attending (at least 12-15 ). But I still wanted to cook few things just in case. And guess what the food was way too much and it lasted for few days in my fridge which was a good thing and better than less food. Every one loved the sangria that I had prepared and also the food very different to their usual meal. We had a laugh and an awesome time. We danced, sang and laughed again. It was one of the best way to celebrate my birthday I can say. So here it goes, another item on my bucket list successfully completed. Hope you enjoyed it and next time you might be invited on my birthday party if you are nearby 😉 Have a wonderful week my friends! Regards, Kavita