Journey from being a shy computer nerd to a traveller and an adventurous soul – What do you think? Would you like to know more about me and how I got this travel bug?

 

405879_10150527281197471_1383247051_nHello my beautiful and handsome friends out there Hope you have a beautiful morning this Saturday as it’s nice and sunny here in Sydney and I am feeling very happy by the fact that I have amazing friends like you guys who are always by my side and fill my life with love and happiness. Thinkng of you and feeling blessed.

Also I have a thought as I was wondering what do you think of me writing a book about how I changed my life and how did I become a traveller and adventurous sydney sider from a shy and workoholic IT nerd. And some more things about my travels and adventures…All of you who know me well enough or have ever met me, I would love to hear from you on this and also how do you feel about supporting me for this if I go ahead

Letter from a stranger who saved my life as I almost died that night

Hi All,

I was going through my stuff and found this letter from a stranger who became an angel and a friend later. It was the time when I was going through a very rough stage in my life. When I look back now it feels like eternity and I can’t believe that I was so upset in my life at that point due to the people whom I loved and cherished once and who hurt me the most in my life. I might not have shared this a year ago but now that I am out of that situation and have become a much stronger and happier person in life then I would like to share this letter that I recieved from a person who saved my life and stood by me that night. It was christmas party that I wanted to go to make sure I get a bit of a change from my current life’s problems and get my mind away from the problems. It was the fear of my ex that took over after few drinks and I panicked that night. Then worst happened and I was lucky to find some angles that night to save my life and help me realise no matter how much people hurt you or damage your life but there are others selfless souls in this world who spread peace and love. And that makes me feel that there is absolutely no reason to give up on people who are no good for you or who treat you mean and create problems in your life. But rather think about the nice people around and the goodness in this world and have hope and love in your heart. Thanks to those people who saved me and whom I would always be grateful to. So here goes the letter:

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Hey,

Nicole and I (photo attached) were there from the start til the very end so I’m happy to meet with you to discuss it, or below is basically the details of the event.

At about 10.30, while we were all sitting in a circle chatting, we noticed you were rather intoxicated.

Within minutes, you collapsed to the floor. 

Rich (photo attached – only one I have on my phone) grabbed you up to sit up but you fell back down.  So he laid you on your side until the medical guys that were on site arrived.

We took you into a side room.  At this point, there were only Nicole, Rich, Pauline and I, including the staff of Town Hall and party organisers, and the med guys were in the room trying to assist.

At this point, your heart rate dropped and there was a 50/50 chance.  You were severely in shocked and body was not coping well.  I dont believe they performed CPR but they had to put a lot of pressure on your chest due to your heart beat slowing right down.  The med guys decided that you needed to be taken to hospital.

As you arrived to the party with no one and Pauline and Rich had to go, Nicole and I volunteered to be present with you in the ambulance and at the hospital.

Whilst in the ambulance I made all attempts to get an emergency contact details through work place, but to no avail.  We also went through your phone and attempted to contact Kunal whom wasn’t able to come due to no transportation.  At this point, we were already aware your situation with regards to your ex (as you had mentioned it to Pauline and we were informed so that we could treat this matter carefully)

We saw numbers on the phone from text messages that we knew not to call. 

Upon arriving at the Sydney hospital the nurse took a breath test, and unfortunately you were 4 times over the limit.  This was consumed within 2-3 hours max.  We knew the mental and emotional state you were in but we had no idea whether you had taken any pills prior or not.  You were admitted to emergency.  This was about midnight.  Nicole and I stuck by you til 2.30.  During this time, you were still quite in shock and intoxicated.  Towards the end, you gained some consciousness and became more aware of the situation ie you being at the hospital.  You got up to Nicole and I.  You opened up a lot to us about the AVO and personal situation.  You managed to give us your address in North shore., as we of course didn’t want to take you back to the address on your licence for your safety.  A lot was said by you which I truly hope one day soon it will be over and brighter days for you.  We even got to the point where both shed tears because you spoke of ending your life to find peace.  I have had friends that passed away and one committed suicide. I showed you a tattoo on my arm of my friend and told you that not a day go by, I dont feel hurt by the selfish act of my friend.  So please, I hope you dont do anything silly to yourself.  I dont know you well enough but I know you are in a bad place, but I do believe that what happens today makes us stronger tomorrow for brighter days ahead. At 2.30 I spoke to the nurse and she informed me that we didnt have long at the hospital as at this stage you were no longer in danger and not life threatening.  We escorted you out onto the road and attempted to get a taxi.  At 3am we managed to get one, and Nicole lives over the bridge so she took you home first, ensured you got into your place ok and she left to go home.  I live in Waterloo so I left as soon as you guys got a cab. 

It was a night that we all didn’t expect but it does happen.  Do not feel embarrassed.  If you were a drunk and its a common thing then I would have stuck by you but due to the fact that you had a lot going on, it was the right thing to do to ensure your safety comes first. 

I hope you are feeling much better now and you said you are seeking help from a counsellor.  I truly hope it works out as you seemed like a really nice person that wants nothing but happiness and to live a normal life.  Stay strong and know that you are not alone.  I am only a phone call away if you need a friend OK. 

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I am not sure what kind of problems you might face in life but smaller or bigger we all are capable to choose a life for ourself and lead a life with happiness if we are willing to. So don’t feel embarrased about things that have happened in your life as we all have a past. But its the choices we make in our present and its the decisions we make to corrct them that matters the most.

A warm and kind hug from a friend – Kavita

You got to have hope and a smile – Rest will follow

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“I would rather be dreaming than living,
Living is just too hard to do.
Its chances not choices,
Noises not voices, Day is just to hard to get through.”

These lines made me think how easy it is sometimes to loose hope. But rough times are only there to remind us that we need to change whatever we are doing and get back to the good things to make it a better start and a better life for ourselves. I have changed, in last one year my life has taken several turns and as a person I have developed a lot, learned a lot and found a new me. In this journey I went through different phases – phase when I was giggly, phase when I was calm and happy, phase when I was upset, phase when I was sad and depressed, phase when I had this unknown fear of new things, phase when I found this new courage in me to do stuff which I never thought I could do before. It was amazing how life has changed so much in just one year. Now when I look back and see where I was and where I have come, I can see what all choices I made and what all options I created myself. I would never regret any of it and if given a second chance I don’t think I would like to change any thing either. I am standing in a booth in the airport, about to embark on another adventure this year, thinking how many people I have met and how many lives I have learned about. The roller coaster of emotions have been overwhelming at times and I have been stubborn not to face the truth several times but yet I have come so far and that’s what makes us all who we are. We keep going in this journey of life and things happen but the truth is ‘it shall too pass’ no matter what. Thats’ why it’s very important to keep your head down a little when time is bad and think ‘it shall too pass’ and keep the light shining in your eyes when you know time is little to enjoy the good things that are happening in life. Make choices that comes from your heart and every once in a while try to disconnect yourself from rest of the world and think about who you are and what you would like to do if rest of the world didn’t exist or didn’t matter, those would be few things that would lead you to the light hidden in your subconscious that might be worth discovering.

I am still learning, every day and every moment as some passes me in my sleep and some catches my fancy when I am awake. But this journey is worth enjoying as we don’t have another life to wait for or loose this one to find another one. Things that haven’t happened yet doesn’t exist in this universe, things that have happened are lost on the way, only things that are happening to you are worth thinking about and living those moments in them. Rest all is just a creativity of your mind as not even a single thing other than present is really true. So try not to focus on past too much as it would take away the time you have to relish your present and don’t plan too much for future as that might have nothing to do with your imagination. I don’t say leave everything and chase your dream yet as before that you might have to go on a journey of self discovery and then only you would know what dreams are real and what are just fantasy that you just picked up on the way. As while going through my own self discovery journey I have learned that the dreams that I had when I was a child have changed quiet a lot. I have got a different understanding of the world and more awareness of myself. I would still like to stay in touch with myself and learn more and more about this world and myself and things are changing every moment as I am writing this and as you are reading this. But that’s brings variety in life as change is the only constant and we need to learn to change in order to survive or rather I should say that we should become change and rest will follow.

With hope and smile, welcome every new day. It might be sunny and beautiful someday whereas it might be raining and cloudy some other times (as we have in Sydney these days). But remember ‘this shall too pass’. Life is not hard its just the choices we make some time that lead us to certain difficulty in life. And once we are aware of this then we make an effort to give it a thought before making any choice. I don’t say wait for too long as the opportunity might pass otherwise but don’t get into mad rush and run blindly everywhere. Open your eyes as even if you end up on a difficult path you would be able to figure out a way out.

To all my friends out there in sadness and happiness, in need of a friend or in need of a voice to help them. This might not give you everything you need but this might help you to think few things on your own and find your own path in life.

Regards,

Kavita

What is it to feel like zero?

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Have you ever felt like this? Yes, I feel like zero these days. A lot of things are planned for future. I look at the calendar on my phone and every day is booked with some or the other thing to do. I cancelled my appointments last weekend as I wanted to sleep after few weeks of amazing fun with no sleep. I wanted to stay home and do nothing in the rainy weather. It was good but I felt like zero. In the midst of such a busy schedule all I could feel was void/vacuum. I felt nothing really. It was not bad or good or anything, just nothing. I am feeling it more and more these days. I do stuff when it comes to meeting friends, travel, plan a travel, work, eat and arrange other things. But other than than my mood is getting much calmer and neutral.  Why I am writing about it? I can’t help but express myself in front of you my friend. I might get some insight from a different perspective I hope as this is something new that I am not totally aware of and it is a bit unsettling to get into unknown state like this.

I think or rather trying to think but nothing comes, I am looking at my surroundings and nothing comes to my mind. I am hoping to bounce back to my bubbly self. But I don’t mind experiencing this state either as everything is much more clear. I can look at things and situations from an un-biased perspective. World around me seems like moving every moment without me being involved at times.

6 Months, 200 Posts, 1000 Followers and 20,000 Hits – Thanks You All (you made it happen)

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Here are few pictures in a frame that I took in Sri Lanka this year.

 

Hello My Beautiful & Motivating Friends,

My heart is full of emotions today as I reached few milestones in terms of statistics and felt overwhelmed with the people who are following my blog at the moment. I couldn’t have made it possible in little less than six months without your love, motivation  and appreciation my dear friend.

As I have quit drinking so cheers with a glass of water at my end and you can pour some bear/wine for yourself to celebrate this awesome day with me. Do write if you have some ideas of motivating things for my blog. I would love to hear from you if you can spare some of your precious time.

Once again, thanks a lot for making this journey much more beautiful for me every day and every moment of my life.

Hugs & Warm Regards to all,

Kavita Joshi

Imaginary Lock on Life

                       

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Its amazing I think, how we lock ourselves in these imaginary restrictions and boundaries in life and keep ourselves from the true happiness and freedom. It is our ultimate right to be free but how many of us are truly free and do things that we love or like. We might be free in the books but in reality we do have many locks on our soul and mind. How many days do we get up and think what I would love to do today? Not many of us really, or atleast go to work with a happy mind and soul. We need to start thinking of life as a journey and realize that there are better ways to live through it – by enjoying and accepting the moments, people and feeling that we come across. Life is short – every one is telling us to be happy but can I do that for you? No, you have to help yourself as each and every individual is enjoying their own journey. Parents can guide and help the children but as human being we interact with each other but the path of life is something we have to choose and we have to walk through it. Its not difficult, believe me or believe yourself for it as what you will think is what you will become eventually.

Break these locks and free yourself, there is a beautiful world out there if you havn’t realized yet. It’s waiting for you to cherish each and every moment you spend as human being and before you move on from this state of being to another and merge into the universe again. Pain can be there in your life but are you going to stop living then? You are still here on Earth, on this journey then why not try to make this experience worthwhile. And once this journey of life will end then you would not have a chance to go back and change the way you lived it. Also do not try to change your past as it is against nature and that’s the way nature has created the whole universe that we move on and do not go back in time ever. If nature doesnt change it then why would you. After all who you are today is because of your past. And how do you think you could have been any better if something else would have happened. If you can’t change the past then why waster your present by thinking about it as then again the next time you look back the current present will be your past and you would realize you havn’t achieved much still. And this is the cycle that will go on forever. Get out of this rut and accept what has happened. Then only you will be able to live in present and then this present will become a better past in your life. That is what I am doing as I realized only recently in my life that I was in the rut of this cycle and was repenting most of the things that have happened in past. I was trying my best to change it and was fighting against nature without realizing that it is impossible.

Now here I am, accpeting my past with my head high – why?  Because I got through all the bad things that came to my life and most of them must have been my own imaginazations of worst as everything happens to us is the only thing that can happen to us in life, universe provides us what we ask for – either conciously or sub-conciously. And I can say that I have been through some kind of hell in my life if any exisit really. So if you think that you want to live a full life before this journey ends then do it now – Make a decision to live and you will eventually. You do not have to spend money for that, you don’t even have to travel or buy anything, all you have to do is see this life as a journey and all the bad things as accidents that happened in some point of time while you were in this train of your body that is moving forward every moment you breathe. And you can either choose to shut your eyes or you can choose to open your eyes and enjoy the view and feel the universe with your heart, soul and mind. I am doing it and I can say that it feels magestic. I am still practicing this as we are trained to do stuff and that’s how we start  working in life all the time which makes it hard to understand the truth and see the reality around. But I will share my journey with you all as it would be great if any one even tries to live life fully as that would start the process and you wouldn’t be far from ultimate peace.

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Why do I travel?

As a human I am gifted with different senses, emotions and witty nature. I was thinking today to write few reasons why do I love travelling. I felt that it’s the basic need for me to feel human and it is something that keeps me in touch of reality. So I am writing the reasons here in my way – Why do I travel?

  • Eyes: I have been gifted with these eyes to see everyday so I want to see what ever this world has to offer. I can choose on my way to close my eyes when I do not want to witness the cruelty of others but I can still look into other’s eyes with compassion and love. I want to express myself to as many people as I can and try to know them better.
  • Skin: We have this amazing ability to feel the touch, I want to feel like a kid again and close my eyes to feel the sensation of touching something different and new everyday. I want to touch the rock in a different country, I want to take sand in my hands and see it getting washed away with water.
  • Ears: I have ears to hear so I want to indulge myself into the music of various kind. I want to hear others to know what they have to say. I want to hear the noise and voice of wildlife creatures. I want to listen to the waves soaring, rivers roaring and wind blowing.
  • Mouth: I want to talk to people from different part of the world. I want to hear how they speak their language and how they pronounce different words. I want to try and speak their language if I can.
  • Lips: I want to smile as much as I can as its the simplest act that can do wonders I feel.
  • Legs: I have been given these legs to be mobile so no reason for me to crib and sit at one place all day. I want to walk around the cities, villages, towns, forests and run in the farms, hike the mountains and drag myself to bed 🙂
  • Tongue:  Why restrict myself from the distinct taste that various cuisines have to offer. I want to immerse myself in the nice aroma of the food all over the world.
  •  Nose: I want to smell the flowers, water, wet soil, farms, food and much more all over the world. 
  • Hands: I want to give a helping hand to someone in need when I travel. I want to shake hands and make new friends. I want to give a hug to someone close to my heart. I want to a gesture of friendliness to strangers.
  • Brain: I want to use it more into creating new ideas, solving problems at hand while travelling. I want to innovate and think new concepts to make every one around happy.
  •  Heart: I want to love myself and others. I want to love nature, love the wildlife, love people. I want to stop being choosy and love unconditionally.
  •  Soul: I want to give peace to my soul. I do not want to bother my soul from the nitty gritty of life but I rather would like to relax and be happy.

 All this happens naturally when I travel. I feel closer to myself and closer to nature when I travel. 

I would summarise it in one line what it means to travel for me – ‘I finally found myself after getting completely lost’. Now that I have found myself I do not want to loose sight of it even for a moment.

I believe that we have been gifted with this beautiful planet that we call Earth. It is so big and full of wonders then why not explore it while we are on this journey of life. Why not get to know how it feels to get up every day and see a new view from the window. Why limit ourselves because the possibilities are limitless. Let’s travel or at least see the world with new eyes and accept ourselves with big and open heart with love, compassion and kindness. You don’t have to travel to far away places to do any of this if that’s what limiting you but you can rather adopt the thinking of a traveller and you will be able to see the same place you walk everyday with new eyes, you will be able to walk to work and will be able to see more, you will be able to explore new parks around the corner, natural resources for your new found happiness. I think you can change the world if you change yourself for good. Use your imagination to create a happy world out there and to do that just create a happy place inside and you will see the world changing outside at the same time.

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Glass Half Empty – Like my life

Glass Half Empty - Like my life

I look at this glass and think of my life. My life is so much like this half full glass. I still need to see so much, feel so much and have so much still in me with what I have seen and lived. And this light from the reflection of sun is like the hope in my heart to live more and more every day 🙂

Have a wonderful weekend my dear friends! I am feeling so happy and peaceful right now and I am sending this good feeling to you from here 🙂

Is money more important than happiness?

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After having read the basics about money in my last post  Money is a good servant, but a bad master, I would like you to take a moment and think about todays situation. Why is that we feel that money is very important. Even when we are growing up, money seems to be very important in life so we always have the desire to have money and to save it if possible for the times when we can spend it for our various needs. But what do we do at times, we become so obsessed with money that we start loving it and try to save even a single penny and avoid spending on ourselves. So either we are on the other side – extravagant or we are too cautious to spend it at all. If any of us have seen financial crisis while growing up or have gone through such times at any point of our lives we start taking money as a source of happiness and security. No matter it does make us secure financially but to some point. As after that we need to be able to spend it on our requirement to grow every now and then. I have been one of those people I guess who have given too much importance to money, not that I start mistreating people or something but when it used to came to myself I would hardly spend any money. It is from last two years that I realised that it’s my money and it’s OK to spend it on myself or to fulfil my needs and desires through it if needed.
It struck me today that I am on the path of being free from the fears as part of my bucket list for the year, but then I also realised I am not free at all. I do have my own attachments and one of them is money. There have been such times that I avoided having food when I am travelling to stay on budget. And I am sure everyone has gone through this at least once when we feel like it’s better to save money for something better than using it for some immediate needs. I am on a mission to find everything about being happy so this is also one of my concerns. This doesn’t mean that we need to go to 5 start hotel everyday to have the best meal, but it does mean that doing small acts like saving a meal at times can also make us fall in love with the attachment of money and start trading our needs in terms of money.
I have been trying to imagine a world without money. Wired right, but then I was thinking about the original purpose of money as well. Why we invented this tool – to fulfil our needs. Right, and what are we doing with it? Accumulating a lot of times. People coming from rich background might not understand it fully that there are emotions attached to money at times. What happens when we start storing it for endless future – people who are not able to earn enough go through poverty. How would be life when there is a balance in terms of money? Don’t you think people would be happier? Did we invent money thinking that there might be people who are buying aeroplanes and on the other end there are people who don’t even have enough food for a meal or shelter for shade? Was this the purpose of money that our immediate family is only the owner of our stored money whereas some of the people around the world are starving to death? How did we let this happen? We didn’t want this did we? That money – piece of paper will become more important than life. How is this fair to mankind that we start trading people for money and selling ourselves for money? Didn’t we devise this tool to make it easier to exchange daily good and food and not to make nuclear bombs? Haven’t we have been spreading unhappiness by creating lack of money in certain countries or areas?
As I am writing this my heart is crying thinking about those new born babies who have to see poverty growing up and who will come to learn that we humans have made money everything and they are nothing without it. My soul is feeling so cramped with this notion that we have limited the natural happiness that is universal and unlimited by our own invention called money. I can’t make people happy today as all they think is if they have money then they can be happy. I can’t bring smile on every face today as they haven’t eaten for few days without money. Why things can’t be simple and we can use the things given to us by nature to feed ourselves and grow rich spiritually. God or whoever made this universe didn’t put a price tag on anything but we did. Everything in universe is really free to survive and live but we are selling even water. We love to own things and trade it later whether it’s land, water or even forests. How can I bring people close to themselves when they are lost in this vicious circle? Share your thoughts on this.

Money is a good servant, but a bad master

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The Meaning of Money

The American Federal Reserve System of Federal Reserve Banks is one of the government institutions that attempts to control inflation so that we Americans will continue to accept our money as having value. According to the Federal Reserve Bank of Minneapolis, money has three functions:

1. it’s a medium of exchange. We accept coins and currency in return for goods and services.

2. it’s a standard of value. We can use it to determine the value of a good or service.  For example, a computer selling at $2500 has a value 2 1/2 times what one selling at $1000 would have.

3. it’s a store of value. We can save our money and spend it for something we want in the future. [Reference: http://library.thinkquest.org/28718/history.html%5D

The History of Money

The history of money begins around 2500 years ago with the first minting of coinage in about the seventh to sixth century BC. Money is any clearly identifiable object of value that is generally accepted as payment for goods and services and repayment of debts within a market or which is legal tender within a country.

Since ancient times people have swapped items of value either in the exchange of gifts or else in markets where a commonly shared system of tokens is more convenient.

Many things have been exchanged in markets including, for example, livestock and sacks of cereal grain (from which the Shekel is derived) – things directly useful in themselves, but also sometimes merely attractive items such as cowry shells or beads were exchanged for more useful commodities. Precious metals from which early coins were made fall into this second category. [Reference: http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/History_of_money%5D

Barter

The first people didn’t buy goods from other people with money. They used barter. Barter is the exchange of personal possessions of value for other goods that you want. This kind of exchange started at the beginning of humankind and is still used today. From 9,000-6,000 B.C., livestock was often used as a unit of exchange. Later, as agriculture developed, people used crops for barter. For example, I could ask another farmer to trade a pound of apples for a pound of bananas.

Shells

At about 1200 B.C. in China, cowry shells became the first medium of exchange, or money. The cowry has served as money throughout history even to the middle of this century.

First Metal Money

China, in 1,000 B.C., produced mock cowry shells at the end of the Stone Age. They can be thought of as the original development of metal currency. In addition, tools made of metal, like knives and spades, were also used in China as money.  From these models, we developed today’s round coins that we use daily. The Chinese coins were usually made out of base metals which had holes in them so that you could put the coins together to make a chain.

Silver

At about 500 B.C., pieces of silver were the earliest coins.   Eventually in time they took the appearance of today and were imprinted with numerous gods and emperors to mark their value. These coins were first shown in Lydia, or Turkey, during this time, but the methods were used over and over again, and further improved upon by the Greek, Persian, Macedonian, and Roman empires. Not like Chinese coins, which relied on base metals, these new coins were composed from scarce metals such as bronze, gold, and silver, which had a lot of intrinsic value.

Leather Currency

In 118 B.C., banknotes in the form of leather money were used in China. One-foot square pieces of white deerskin edged in vivid colors were exchanged for goods. This is believed to be the beginning of a kind of paper money.

Noses

During the ninth century A.D., the Danes in Ireland had an expression “To pay through the nose.” It comes from the practice of cutting the noses of those who were careless in paying the Danish poll tax.

Paper Currency

From the ninth century to the fifteenth century A.D., in China, the first actual paper currency was used as money. Through this period the amount of currency skyrocketed causing severe inflation. Unfortunately, in 1455 the use of the currency vanished from China. European civilization still would not have paper currency for many years.

Potlach

In 1500, North American Indians engaged in potlach, a term that describes the exchange of gifts at banquets, dances, and various rituals. Since the trading of gifts was so important in figuring the leaders’ community status, potlach went out of control as the gifts became more extravagant in an effort to surpass others’ gifts.

Wampum

In 1535, though likely well before this earliest recorded date, strings of beads made from clam shells, called wampum, are used by North American Indians as money. Wampum means white, the color of the clam shells and the beads.

Gold Standard

In 1816, England made gold a benchmark of value. This meant that the value of currency was pegged to a certain number of ounces of gold. This would help to prevent inflation of currency. The U.S. went on the gold standard in 1900.

Depression

Because of the depression of the 1930’s, the U.S. began a world wide movement to end tying currency to gold. Today, few nations tie the value of their currency to the price of gold. Other government and financial institutions now try to control inflation.

Today

At present, nations continue to change their currencies. For example, the U.S. has already changed its $100 and $20 banknotes. More changes are in the works.

Tomorrow

Tomorrow is already here. Electronic money (or digital cash) is already being exchanged over the Internet.

Reference: http://library.thinkquest.org/28718/history.html?tql-iframe

Why do we use money?

We use money as payment for goods or services. Today people use coins, banknotes (bills), checks, credit cards, and debit cards (the cards used at automatic teller machines, or ATMs) to pay for things. Before money was invented, you could only get something from another person by bartering or trading something else for it. It was hard to make even trades and the deal had to be made on the spot. The introduction of money offered people greater flexibility when trying to get goods or services: it made it possible to put standard values on things, and money could be saved and used for future purchases. [Reference: http://www.answers.com/topic/why-do-we-use-money#ixzz2UXjTicdl%5D

Money Wears Out

It doesn’t take long for money to wear out. In fact, money can wear out in as little as 15 months. The Federal Reserve Bank of Atlanta shows the approximate life of paper currency denominations and coins.  A table based on its information follows:

Denomination

Length of Time

$1.00

18 months

$10.00

18 months

$5.00

15 months

$20.00

2 years

$50.00

5 years

$100.00

8 1/2 years

Coin

25 years

Commercial banks send worn-out notes to a Federal Reserve Bank to be replaced. Then, the Reserve Banks sort the money they get and decide whether or not it can be reused. If it can be, they put it in vaults until it recirculates again through the commercial banks. Reserve Banks then burn the unusable paper money and return the damaged coins to the U.S. Treasury.

Bucket-List 2013 Week 1 – Belgian Beer and a Girl with a hood

Hello My Lovely Bloggers,

A big hug to all from me. I had an amazing few days since I have started this bucket-list for this year. And I am back to share it with you to spread this joy around. You know I have 50 items of all sorts of things on my bucket list for 2013. Here is also a link for the same if you haven’t had a look.

My Promise to live life – My BucketList 2013

A little bit different and also another post about the fears I have in my life with a reflection of other reader’s experiences along with it.

My Fears

One items already finished earlier this week:

One item crossed off the list with an awesome day

Friday night with bunch of girls with party dress and then a getting changed into totally different look with boots and a hood for a beer and some good music alone. I can’t believe its just Saturday night now and I still have a full day left whereas I feel like I have lived almost a whole life in last few days. As you know I have big time fear to go into a bar/pub by myself. Not any more…lol….makes me happy to say that finally…as I have been on this mission now and feeling that its going away. It might still take a while to get an expert in it..lol..but it will happen and I am certain about that.

Item Number #30 – Try at least 10 different cuisines – Belgian Cuisine and Belgian Beer

I was supposed to meet this group of people from new meetup group I just joined in a Belgian beer cafe and I was happy to try this new  place called ‘Heritage bar and restaurant’. It was a shame as no one turned up and in other situations I would have been completely. But not today not this year my dear friend. It will be very hard for life to disappoint me now that I have got a taste of happiness. So here I was seeing opportunity to go to this bar by myself as part of overcoming one of my fear https://talkingexperience.wordpress.com/2013/05/07/what-are-my-fears-people-say-i-dont-have-any-but-lets-look-at-it/  (item #50). So I went in and asked at the reception if any one from the group has arrived. Answer was no. I went in and checked for the best Belgian beer and as I am a sweet tooth so thought that something sweet will be nice. Finally I got myself ‘Kriek’. Kriek lambic is a style of Belgian beer, made by fermenting lambic with sour Morello cherries. The name is derived from theDutch word for this type of cherry (kriek).

I just loved it as I had Bavarian beer before but never Belgian so only today I came to know that it’s known one of the best in the world. And I loved it as well. With a nice book I had a good hour by myself. Then I realised that I can try the food and that will make towards item #30 on my bucket list as well. So I ordered ‘White Rabbit Pie braised in dark beer served atop creamy mash potato and Dutch carrots‘ for mains. I know I am not vegetarian anymore that’s what I just told my flatmate as well. But I think this year for me is all about knowing and experiencing new things and it is one of them. Food was good as well and meanwhile there was a guy sitting in the bar for quiet some time in very casual clothes and a backpack that gave me clue for him being a traveler. And you know what since I have started travelling, I have got a sweet spot for travelers in my heart and whenever possible I try to make sure that they feel home even for an hour or so talking to them at times. And also I am always curious to know about their experience. I am not too bold to go to every traveler and start talking but I don’t miss an opportunity either. So here I was having dinner and this guy was also trying to order dinner for himself. It was a moment when I realized that both sides there is an amount of willingness to share the company for dinner than sitting alone. So I introduced myself and came to know this very nice guy, Boris, is from Russia who was travelling here and New Zealand for two weeks. Conversation started with some facts and direction soon went towards philosophy and why people travel kind of topics. It was just an amazing time during I had really. Such a mind opening time when this person was questioning many things that I never even bothered to think. It is awesome to talk to people from different culture and countries. As you get to see a whole different perspective at times of world and life and so much more. So I accompanied this fellow traveler, feeling myself a traveler as well, to the train station and till this time it felt like we are friends from a long time. This is the best feeling with travelling and travelers at times I think when it doesn’t take long to get along as both people are so friendly and open to talk to others. I bid good bye to Boris and promised if I ever come to Russia then I will visit him. What best can be there than to have a local to show you around.

So I am one more step closer to my bucket-list. Oh you are waiting for the interesting news from yesterday – Girl with a hood? OK, right I need to share that. Now before I start let me tell you that I used to read a lot of comic books when I was a kid and always believed in super heroes who save the world in the night. I know sounds funny right but that was me when I was growing up really 😉 So here is the story:

Time: 11:30 PM

Phone ringing… ‘Hey Beijie, Do you want to join for a drink? I am at the train station just got back after meeting friends for drink’

‘No, I am going to bed as feeling tired dear so you have fun and I will talk to you tomorrow.”

“Alright, I am just walking home as well.”

Dressed in a party dress and a white fur coat. Listening to music and walking a bit slower because of the high heels. Walking home in the hope to get rid of the sandals as soon as possible. Still willing to go for another drink after 3 vodka and one wine….got home cold and quickly got changed with so much energy…may be the clothes were not comfortable… now dressed in jacket with a hood and boots…another image of darkness, trying to get lost in the night and walk to get few drinks. Getting over the fear of loneliness and daring to go alone to a bar. Sitting in front of the heater re-thinking the whole plan of going out again. It was an adventure if I do and also can turn into something really stupid after few drinks I already had. But no matter what I was thrilled with this idea of going to a cool bar I had just searched for -‘Kelly’s on King’. So finally I thought I can at least just go for a walk. So I got my phone with music on and got the hood on and left home. Here I was all on my own feeling like some super hero out and about. Got near the bar where I wanted to go but then I went to ATM to get some money and headed back to the bar. It was one of the coolest bars with Karaoke on the move. I enjoyed a beer with awesome ambiance. It was a good thing to listen to my heart really. I came home and slept like a baby as I had to meet a friend this morning for breakfast. So this was the story. Let me know what do you think 😉 I know it’s getting too much of the bar fear thing…I am also thinking in the same like and I think I should better start work upon my half Marathon goal before putting on more weight with these drinks now. Bye for now, I will be back with further updates..promise for year 2013 😉

Keep smiling and stay happy my dear friend!

How can we predict future when things are changing every moment?

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Many of us want to know what will happen in future? We are so curious at times that we even try to get some professional help to predict the future. But it made me think one day discussing it with a friend that every action in present leads us to our future and each action we take differently will change the direction to the future resulting into a unique future. I have not studied this subject very well so I would not question what people with vast knowledge might have to say. Although I would love to discuss it with the people reading here whether they agree with me or not.

I think it’s not possible to predict future as we every moment as we breathe creating it and working towards a unique future every moment. For example if we start our day with a bad or unfortunate incident and then depending upon our reaction to that even the whole day changes accordingly. Either we can choose to stay happy and try to smile considering what has happened can not be changed and try to make sure that rest of the day is better. Or we can feel bad about it and crib about it the whole day and then have an awful day. What I am saying is a very common thing and hopefully we all know it, but it is difficult to actually react in positive manner if we are not positive inside. So we not only have to think about the outside reaction but also need to think why we react in certain manner. Sometimes it might happen that we have something going on inside that might make our reaction go bad as well even if nothing big happens.

Lets close our eyes, now you would think how will we read this post then ..hehehe OK let me tell you then, this is an exercise you are supposed to do if you really want to know what’s going on inside you right now. And if any thing happens in next few minutes what will be your reaction. So what you need to do? Simple close your eyes for 30 seconds as it will be hard to do longer at first and then think how you are feeling – uneasy, frustrated,happy, sad,angry,bored or any other feeling. Then put it into the category of positive and negative. Now this will most probably drive the reaction force from you in case any thing happens. So make sure you try to change the inside as much as possible. It will change your reaction to things quickly and in a nice way. You will not regret why did you not do something differently to change the series of events in your day. What happens at times is not in our hand but what happens after that is definitely in our hands and there we can make a difference. Think about it and take one day at a time and observe the events and see how you made a difference.

Now you would think all this philosophy I am telling here, any one can  say these things. But the point is whether I practice this myself or not. Then I would tell you my experience and how it changed things. Just a simple example out of my many experiences – I was getting bored for many weekends. I talked to a very good friend regarding this that since I have come back from travelling I am facing some problem settling in normal life. And as I have just started fresh in Sydney so not much plans are made yet for the weekends and I am so bored. He said one line  – ‘Where is boredom? Is it here on the table, on the walls or on the floor? It is in your brain.” And I am so happy that I had that conversation with him as I did realize that I am always busy doing something or the other and in this race I have almost forgotten to sit back and relax sometime. Or not panic if there is nothing much happening on the weekend. This Saturday, I made sure that I am feeling good doing anything and I watched movies, went out to buy some washers for the tap, came back in windy weather and smiled looking at the cloudy sky. I then decided not to go to a party that was decided long back looking at the weather as it might have a really bad night to go out. But unlike other times I did not feel bad about any of my decisions taken during that day. Then before going to bed I decided to have a very good Sunday. I slept around 1:30 AM which was quiet late but nothing unusual  But it could have made me asleep all afternoon. But no, I had decided in my head that I want to be able to say that I had a wonderful Sunday. So I woke up around 9 AM and it was a beautiful sunny day. I had breakfast, watched a movie in a relaxed manner then painted my hands with Heena (http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Mehndi). Then went out with my friends and you know what now I am able to say that I did have an awesome Sunday. So, now you see – make that decision in your mind of having a good day and trust yourself that you are capable of having a good day and you deserve it. Then see the magic 🙂

Have an awesome week ahead dear readers! And this is your moment to make that decision that you will have a good Monday tomorrow. You know what, that smile suits you so make sure you smile at the end of this post as that will make my post worth a million if you do 🙂

Life as we know it – Learn the Truth (Part 4)

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Links to the last few posts in this series –

https://talkingexperience.wordpress.com/2013/01/17/unlearn-to-learn-the-truth-part-3-sky-high-angels-and-god/

https://talkingexperience.wordpress.com/2013/01/13/unlearn-to-learn-the-truth-part-2/

https://talkingexperience.wordpress.com/2013/01/13/unlearn-to-learn-the-truth-part-1/

Note: No connection but you will find it interesting to have a look I am sure.

Days when you feel as if you have achieved nothing, moments that pass without registering your presence. Life as we know it has different phases and cycles everyday. All you can do is to accept. We all are humans, very prone to errors and mistakes – we all are social creatures bound to love and hate. Sometimes its love that gives us a lesson, the other times its the feeling of hatred that leaves the imprint on our heart. But we all are part of this infinite universe, playing different roles in life. Dreaming, when we can, moving forward when we can, complaining, procrastinating, cribbing over small or big things in life.

One day it all changes by some harsh and true words or fatal accident or illness or close encounters to death. We stop for a moment and realize its all for nothing. We try to cling onto things that will never matter in our life one day. We try to get attached to things that we wouldn’t exist in future. We all think that things will make us happy, but it will hardly last long. So what now when we have already lived our lives chasing things that never important. Things that didn’t last long in our life. What can we do now to undo what has already been done.

Change is what make us think this and change is the answer to this as well. We can not travel back in time, but we need to realize that time spent thinking about past is also not going to make a big difference. All you can do is focus in the present. Mind you, not even future is in our control as that is the place nobody can go to until unless it transform into present one day.

Remember we are born and given a life with a simple task – to live. Is that so difficult to do? We are basically designed to do that only. How to live? Is that what you are thinking? Or is that not what we are doing already? Either way you should do some retrospection really. And see how many of us are actually are sleeping properly or eating properly. Now I might start sounding a bit harsh when I say – All we are doing is being lazy and stuck in this cycle of daily routine and then our sub-conscious mind take over and we almost switch off our brain from time to time as there is nothing much to think about. We are prone to get accustomed to habits and in today world we get accustomed to not doing new things very often in life. We simply don’t like change.

Do you want to know what’s right and what’s wrong then? Get the basics right then. No point of reading a lot and get a lot of theory in your mind and keep yourself even more puzzled. Its like trying to remembering the complex formulas of mathematics whereas the basic formulas are not clear. When we start studying, the first thing we learn is fundamentals and when you are done with it, then you move to something more challenging. Till then you keep practicing the basics.

Do you want to know what’s happening with most of us today? We have forgotten the basics and we are stuck with those complex formulas and we are trying so hard to fit those into life and make some sense of it. Let’s take a simple example of eating habit. How many of us will say that their eating habits are perfectly good? Not many I believe. In today’s modern world we are so much dependent on fast food and preserved food. Even think of skipping a meal for working harder at times. Is it worth? Why are you working – I know not for food only its for your brain but how can you expect a car to perform the best with no fuel? Other than gym or some exercise, do you really listen to your body? We are pushing ourselves over the limits with things these days. And then what about soul.

We are not just body but soul as well. What are we doing for it then? We want to have the world to ourselves at time, we want money, success and a lot more. But we you think you can handle it all when we can’t even take care of the most precious gift that God has given us – body, mind and soul. Can you replace them ever – No. So what’s the rush to achieve everything whereas you have the most of the universe – yourself. Stop for a moment, think and try to take this all in and think about it. I might sound a but preachy here but truth is true words don’t taste good similarly as medicine is not always sweet but its important to heal from it. Similarly we need to work on ourselves to heal our broken heart, heal our bashed body and heal our mind for a healthy mind, body and soul. That’s when you need to think about other things when you are capable enough to take care of yourselves first.

Note: I was so sleepy writing this that I didn’t really care much about making it at a polite note so hope you take the crux and don’t mind the harsh tone. Although sometimes we need to be jolted to wake up from this sleepy way of living. 🙂 Have a healthy mind, soul and body that will lead to a happy life!

 

My journey from a thinker to an observer

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I used to keep thinking about ‘stuff’ all the time whether in train or bus on foot. I never realised that there were so many things happening around me all the times that I kept missing because I was too observed in myself most of the times.

Since I have started travelling and taking pictures I realised that I have changed – changed from a thinker to an observer. No matter where I am – in a bus, plane, train or street, I observe most of the things around me. Is it good or bad? Good of course as I am able to appreciate my surroundings and feel more aware. And how does that help? Yes, it does believe me as this way I am living in the present rather focusing my energy either on past events or future plans.

This does not mean that I have stopped thinking but only when needed and not like a lost soul in her thoughts all the time. It is amazing as I don’t feel sad about things in past and I don’t feel pressurized but the future plans. All I am doing is just live the present and accept things as they happen. It feels very different as I am the kind of person who is more indulged in past and future than present usually. And not to mention it always makes me feel either frustrated/sad/hasty/excited/pressurized thinking about stuff that I could have done differently or things I have to do in near future. Where the truth is I can’t change the past and future is yet not there. All I can do is planning for future in an organized way possible and then leave it for the time being till it become present to actually execute it.

I feel freer as well as living in the present means only to deal with things that are there in front of you and not to burden yourself with everything else in the world. This is what Mahatma Gandhi said that one should live his/her life as if he/she is going to die the very next day. And I think travelling has changed my habit in such a way that I am indirectly living my life that way only.

What will be my gift to the world…

What will I give back when I have taken so much from the world?

I came to this world with nothing (empty handed and naked baby) and had nothing but fortunately today I have everything one can live his/her life comfortably with. Give and take is like action and reaction. I am writing this post while sitting idle in the airport, waiting to go home once my friend confirms that his night shift at work is over. And makes it 2 AM in the morning. SO any mistake in spelling or grammar might occur looking at the time. But I don’t intend to edit this as its not about my knowledge of English language or anything so we can ignore it for now.

A thought regarding death has made me think while reading this book – ‘The Last Lecture’ by Randy Pansen. And I have just read 18 pages of the book so far. Sometimes we try everything to avoid the inevitable question. And this is the exact moment when I am confronting myself with the question – What have I given back to the world that offered me so much of everything I needed in this life so far. It might not be like taking a loan from someone where you are bound to pay back. But moreover it’s our moral responsibility . Its like when someone does something good for us and we feel grateful to them and want to do something in return. And at times we do something good for someone else if given the chance to show our gratitude towards the world and good souls living in it.

It is our moral responsibility that we can easily ignore if we choose so as no one is going to point a finger on it. It is one of those duties that we do when no one forces us to do. I think I have tried to do few things in life although I am not sure how many of them were selfless tasks and how many of them were performed in order to fulfil the need of self satisfaction within the limits of my comfort zone.

I can write a book if I start on this topic so I should better summarize it. Things that I have done so far for society:

1. Volunteer in Red Cross for a year in Visitor Scheme.
2. Opened an youth organization – ‘Prabhat’. We used to provide people suffering from leprosy with clothes donated by the people in town. Also by spending some time with the kids in orphanage and provide them some food or fruits during our visit. Although it could not go a long way due to the politics around the area and also because of lack of determination on our part where we chose our career in different city over this when time came. As it needed our sacrifice to stay in the town to grow the organization as we were just not ready for this.

These are just two main tasks that I can remember and other than this I think I do small acts of kindness at times but nothing really big. Oh that reminds me of my own thought of sponsoring a kid in some of the developing countries if I get another job (that obviously indicates that I am going to be jobless in next two days, resigned from my current employer).

And also here are few more things on top of my mind that I would like to do in near future:

=> Volunteer in Red Cross again after a year break for longer time once I am back in Sydney
=> Help someone personally and not just financially

Oh yes I am already giving back the money to society I have earned so far by travelling around 😉 (It was a joke). See I can still crack a poor joke at this time of the day with a coffee in my system. But joke apart I am going to give it a serious thought though and may write the findings here as part of self realization. Till then you might also find it interesting to do some analysis.

Please share your thought and views on this or the things you think you have done to contribute. I would love to hear back from you my friends.

Goodnight for now. Time for me to get a taxi home and get few hours of sleep before attending to the needs of regular like in India again (as I have just arrived in Delhi from Colombo, Sri Lanka).

Sweet Dreams,
Kavita

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Little things can make big difference

Life is struggle and fun at times. Sometimes its hard to live each moment when stuck in hardship, whereas its fun living a day or week when happy. But the most important thing to remember is that little things can make a big difference at times. I felt it so many times. For example waiting for the plane for two hours in Hawaii and then came to know that the flight is delayed for another two hours. I was tired and exhausted as had to wake up 4 AM in the morning to catch the flight and now it was cold and long wait in the waiting room. Could not get enough sleep as was worried to wake up this early and now extremely cold in the airport so can’t sleep any ways. Then finally came close to board and got a compliment from the security that you have got beautiful eyes. Don’t know whether my eyes were partially closed or open but I think that made a big difference at the start of my day and brought a smile on my face.

There was a guy sleeping on the floor as we were boarding the flight and I felt that he hasn’t realized that the flight has started boarding so I shook him to wake him up and asked if he is waiting for this flight and if yes then the flight has started boarding. He was a bit dazed (may be too tired) and then gave me a grateful smile and thanked me that I woke him up as otherwise he would have missed the flight. I met him again in Sydney in the airport and he thanked me again for waking him up. It was just a small thing but it made a big difference in his day.

I met the fellow passenger in the plane sitting next to me. I started talking to him and he informed me that he is sponsoring a child in Philippines for last few years. He pays 50 AUD every month and it pays for the school fees, clothes and other necessary things for this kid. It was amazing how 50 Dollar each month made such a big difference in some one’s life.

It is true that we shall never ignore that one small act of kindness can make a huge difference is some one’s life. Its not only money but even a smile can give some one else a reason to smile. So lets start every day by one simple act and if we practice every day then we are actually making difference in 365 lives at least. And this is a big number. I will try to do this and lets see if you can try as well. Let me know what did you do different as it will inspire rest of us as well.

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Sweet-tooth….I can Understand

Who doesn’t like a candy or a lolly? At least most of us have some time in our life have savored an ice-cream or desert. I have taken a picture of my plate in Sydney Tower restaurant. I know this is too many but being a sweet tooth I could not resist but try all kinds of deserts available. Have you ever wondered how the custom of sugar started? There is almost 100 pounds of sugar consumption in United States every year. It was also called ‘White Gold’ once and the recipe was a well-preserved secret. It is a native product of Southeast Asia. Brazil produces the most today although Portuguese had brought it there in 16th century.

It was very interesting how Sugar played a major role in slavery as well. It was like a three-step cycle. Slaves would be sent to work for it, once the product is made it will be sold to Europe and then more products would be brought to Africa and slaves would be bought with them.

Britain is also argued to have lost their colonies to independence because the military was protecting the sugar islands. So the same sugars we eat almost every day in various food products have made its way to different culture and nation with a lot of stories. It was identified and used in the form of sugarcane very early in India. No wonder I have so many deserts to enjoy the evening today being an Indian 🙂

Will I ever live again?`

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I get up, have something to eat, leave for work, come back home and at times I do pray

Maze is the word I would give to this life that keeps my brain working

My heart is not heard most of the times and it keeps asking

Will I ever live again, in this complex emotional rain?

Its killing me like this and giving so much of pain, Will I ever live again?

 

I console myself by saying it’s going to be different every night I go to bed

I mishear my heart and think it’s happy again whereas it’s not what’s being said

Why we do this to ourselves why we make our soul cry

There are no tears left, even the eyes gone dry

Will my soul ever see the sun again in this foggy life?

My inner voice makes me shiver by asking if it will ever be heard again.

 

But then that’s life, is what I think every time I get tired

When there no hope and no one to make me inspired

Not even a single thing I get that I ever desired

Life is life and no matter what it does, I think it still needs to be admired

So I have almost ,stopped asking this question whether I will live again

But I am not sure how long I will sustain without asking – Will I ever live again!

Snoozing Period – Quiet before the Storm (What’s going to happen)

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You must be thinking I started my blog with all the self realization stuff and more regarding spirituality and now here I am only with reviews for movies and old travel stories. What happened to the self awareness journey? To be honest I am thinking the same as I was so happy for constantly 16 days since New Year or should say even from Christmas Eve when I went to my friends place for a celebration. But the truth is I am going through a negative phase now. It was the peak time to feel so light and now I am gone to the other side where I am again stuck with real life problems. Although it does not feel as bad as it used to may be because I am still aware of what’s happening so not much impacted by it. But being happy is not being easy really. There are times when I look at the world and it all feels the same and that is because inside it’s a storm that’s taking its toll.

I was seeing everything clearly only few days ago and now again it’s the fogginess that has taken over. I can’t see or feel anything all I can do is to save myself from feeling sick or bad about this phase. I am fighting with the negativity around me. And again to remind myself it’s just me nothing else has changed. It’s funny the same things that were source of happiness have turned into cold frozen objects today. Why, why I am going through this? I have so many questions. My soul sometimes wants to cry out loud and ask the universal power to come and merge into me. May be I am not completely ready that’s why it’s only in bursts that I am able to get the knowledge. For few days it was like a smooth stream of energy that was flowing in me from that universal powerful source and now I feel I am getting drained.

I have been seeing something floating in my room in the night for last couple of days on infrequent basis. I wake up in the middle of the night and see this image of an object or seem more like condensed white energy in my room that is floating around and feels like trying to get my attention. I know I might sound a bit weird but I promised to share all I am experience in life at the moment and here I am. Astonishing fact is that this energy is not scary at all. It has happened 5-6 times so far. I wake up in the middle of the night see this energy and go back to sleep and it feels like as if it’s just there and not to hurt me but just to be with me. Its white and I remember seeing some floating things last month and that was all black and it scared the hell out of me. I prayed in my heart and I was almost sinking in my heart all scared. But this time this energy is all white and it feels so pure. I am not sure whether it’s the lack of sleep as I have had enough for last few days at least or my sleeping pattern or the new place I moved into. But I saw the black energy/object in my old place whereas I can see the white ones here in the new place. I am not sure what is it all about really but my gut feeling is giving me an indication that my life is going to change and something big is going to happen and I am just getting prepared for it.

I am a science student and like to have a proof of everything that is real but I think I have also opened myself to see the truth and to be able to see beyond the obvious in the world. So I want to be ready for everything – if there is something I need to learn to achieve the peace and freedom in life. I told some of people I know at work about it and they laughed it off, not sure why I talked about it though may be because I didn’t believe it myself. Then today morning I told my flatmate and she advised me to throw anything that I might feel can carry some negative energy. I threw a teddy bear and few more things from my old place. Teddy I threw because the person who gave it to me was very depressed in life and often used to talk to the bear. And it might sound stupid but I thought maybe this might be carrying all the negative energy from that person to me. And when I don’t talk to the teddy (not many people do really) so it might be trying to get my attention. I know it sounds so odd and I can’t believe I am thinking like this as if it’s a script from a scary movie. But I like and respect my flatmate so I did as she suggested. She calls me an action girl as I act upon any suggestion very quickly if I think that can make any difference to make my life better. And I think that’s what I have learned in life to change things as soon as possible to make your life better as sometimes it gives you more pain not to change. Anyways I am hoping not to see anything anymore if it was because of those things. But part of me says that it was not the things it was something more that is trying to tell me something. Bigger than anything I have ever experienced. And it is only when I am sleeping I can see it because then only I am able to connect to my sub-conscious mind that knows it all. When we are conscious we think from our brain and decide on the basis of our most recent experience whereas when we are in sleep our conscious mind doesn’t interrupt the process of thought formation. That is also the reason we dream as it’s the sub-conscious mind that take over and starts working. I think this is enough for now. Let’s see how I go now and whether it was just a little malfunctioning of my senses or something real. I will keep you posted.  

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Forget the Differences – Make it a better place to live

Forget the Differences - Make it a better place to live

Working together to earn the living. This shows how human can work with others to achieve the common goal. When we can get along with animals at times then why it is a problem to get along with another human being. Involving with violence and developing the feeling of revenge and hate. Why is it so difficult to just love everyone and work together for a common goal – Make this world a better place!

Let Go – Gift for yourself (Part 1)

We hold on to things since we are born. We clutch our hands on whatever things we can as a baby. May be because we leave a world where we felt safe and secure for almost 9 months and then we came to this world full of people and new scenery. It’s the feeling of belonging that we all want. Although sometimes we mix that with things and emotions and memories. We are good with sticking to habits but not very good in choosing them consciously first. And since childhood we start to see the change in everything around us. If we can make ourselves flexible to do that then it is ideal. But not all of us can cope with changes that take place around us all the time and we try to hold on to different things, emotions, memories to keep ourselves in an impression that things are the same and we are living the similar life as we used to.

It hurts when we start holding on to negative emotions like anger or feeling of revenge. Any such emotions leads to frustration and as found by science that emotions work as “on-off switch” for learning. And every day we have to learn or use our brain productively most of the time. Once we have the negative feelings then our brain interpret any information as negative and we lose interest quickly. And if we are happy then the brain interprets the same information as positive and sends a message of purpose and excitement that in turn directs the behaviour towards a goal.

Just like food, it is very important what we feed our brain as well. And we are not referring to the information but rather talking about the emotions as they are the key drivers of how we are going to perceive that information and how effectively we are going to make use of it. You must have observed when we are sad or grumpy we tend to miss bits and pieces of information that we either read or watch in television. Whereas when we are emotionally light or I would say emotionally available then we are more focused on what we are reading/watching.

Let go of such emotions. Holding on to old things is not as bad as holding on to the old grudges. Every time someone either treat us bad or make us do things forcefully, we get angry and if we hold on to that anger then it stirs the negative energy in us from time to time. Also if we have fear in us about failure in life or work then again that emotion drives our behaviour. We will have to first learn what emotions we might be holding on to. We can do some exercises like writing down the past memories that still makes us feel bad and observe how we feel when we think about it. Most of the emotions can be related to fear and anger. Now I understand that process of let go is not as easy as we say. But I would say that take it as a decision you make. We never harm anyone else by hating them or fearing them but we are our own enemy when we do that. It hurts us and no one else. So why not give yourself a gift and let go of such emotions. Forgiveness is the best way to do it. Decide that you want to forgive people who hurt you. Decide that you want to change the association of your fear to certain situations and see them in new light.

It’s just a start and I am going to write more about how we can use various techniques to let go as we move on. I would like to hear your perspective and problems that you face when you try to let go. As I am no expert but I am trying to let go as well. Why not we do it together as we all need support when we try to become a better and happy person.

Heal the Broken Heart – Give me some Love

Take away the pain, take away the anger,

Power of universe, I ask you to fill me with love

Love me like a mother, love me like a father,

I want to feel your unconditional love again

I was little when I learned to be good,

To be loved

I was little when I was told to behave,

To be amongst the love ones

Make me realise that one needs no reason to be loved,

Break the old rule of give and take

You know we all need love,

You know we all deserve to be loved

So heal my broken heart and fill it with love,

Give me some peace and let me be free

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You make me feel precious, you make me feel worthless. You make me feel happy, you make me feel sad. You take me to the sky, you throw me to the ground. Is it love that you are showing or the contradiction inside yourself?

We should not loose self steam or feel worthless with people who make us feel like this as its not us but it is their problem they have to deal with.

You make me fee…

Movies – Way away from present

Movies are one of the great creative way to live in dream with our eyes open. I am not sure how much I might have to get used to of the fact that most of the times we are actually training our brain to live in a dream. Video games are another example for the same. I always loved movies but now I am in a stage where I am questioning my interest reason being that when watching a movie or anything in TV we are actually ignoring the present. Sitting in a couch and watching something recorded in past or live somewhere else that is not the reality around us. Our brain has to work to create that illusion that this is reality and we start imagining this new world around us whereas we stop focusing on whats actual present. 

Not just movies but there are heaps of ways we are actually training our brain to ignore the reality. And now as a result our brain is not focused any more, it keeps getting distracted from the present and either dwell on the past or future but present. I am not sure how much unlearning  will be needed to actually retrain my brain to focus on present and calm down a little bit.

Although we have been able to create a better world by our creativity – a window into the dreams that gives us sense of happiness, but we need to see the bigger picture now and create the beautiful reality around us. Stop living in a movie and create our life more interesting than a movie. Is it possible? May be to some extent. Why not we give it a try. I will try to do this as last time I watched a movie I was thinking more and focusing on movie less. So who knows what I might find out if I am successful in this new path.

But I would share it with you just like other things. 

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Time Travel to be ChildLike

Time Travel to be ChildLike again

I was walking back home from work today. It was such a beautiful day. Cool breeze made me feel calm and very relaxed. I felt so much energy even though the day had been really long at work. I felt the air I was breathing, I saw people walking on the footpath, I saw the beautiful buildings made by man, I saw couples holding hands with the ray of hope in their eyes, I crossed a park with a small lake where lots of birds were chirping, I saw the diners enjoying their meal in relaxed environment and I also saw a girl running and looking a bit scared, then I saw a guy holding a map who was trying to figure out the directions and so on. What was the difference – I was living in the moment. I was living the present and cherishing it completely. I did not think about the past and I was not lost in the dreams of future. I was aware of every moment I lived today evening.

And what was the result – I was smiling as my heart was full of joy, joy of life, joy of sharing my life with so many other fortunate people, joy of being able to feel things and joy of being able to love everyone in my life. I must have looked ridiculous as I was smiling at my own on the way back home. But it was hard to contain that joy in me and make a poker face. Happiness was all over my face. I felt like dancing all the time and I felt so light that I felt I could run faster than time. It was the evening I think I have not experienced in ages or perhaps never before. It was the evening of utter exuberance. It was as if I had nothing to worry about in the world. And how did it happen.

For that we need to become like a child and free ourselves from everything but the joy of life. Every breathe we take is the blessings and is full of life. We have the gift to feel the very air we breathe, the water we drink and the land we walk upon. To be able to enjoy again we might have to look back and remember how we used to behave as a child. We need to learn from children. We need to start observing nature. Is there anyone out there who did not enjoy running in the part as a child? Is there anyone who actually liked the Air-con more than natural cool breeze when growing up, of course depending upon the temperature it might be a differnt case? Who didn’t like to play with water and get dirty in sand/soil, if given a chance?

That is because we are born with natural instinct and we lose them as we grow up or I would say stop listening to our inner self. To learn the truth and be happy again forever we need to go back to the roots and re-activate those functions we are born with. The powers that we have as humans, we need to find it again and use that energy to make our life fulfilled. In some countries/ cultures people say that children are the purest form of God. Why because they are more like God I think because they are free spirit, with no fear, happy, sensitive to others, friendly and open. As we grow, we suppress most of these qualities and the sufferings starts from there.

I am going to start that inner child in me and nurture it again, as I might be lost so far but not anymore.

Happiness Connection – Part 1

The true purpose of our life is to be happy. Now does it means that I should go out there and do whatever makes me happy even if that means drinking alcohol, smoking, eating fast food or harming some one. No, not at all. And there comes the concept of ‘connection of happiness’. We associate happiness with a lot of things and many times they are not right. For example eating sweets to make ourselves happy when we are sad or drinking alcohol to get over some one. These are the associations that we train our brain with for years of practice. 

Stop right there and list all such habits that deep inside you know are not good for you. This will not stop you from doing it but awareness is the first step. Until unless we accept that any habit is not good for us, we are not going to leave it. So it is the choice that we need to make first to know what are the things that we are doing are not good for us. Its like doing the diagnosis of a disease, only then it can be cured. 

Step 2 is to decide that you want to change the connection of happiness from wrong habits to healthy and right habits. Also you are the one who is supposed to define right or wrong as for some one it can be for a run every time they get sad and for another it might be meeting a friend and talk about it. Its also a matter of convenience and available options. So it is important to give your self some options before strictly adhering to the new habits. Most of the times we do not stick to the new habits because we assume there is only one choice and if we can’t stick to it then we are a failure and we get even more sad and end up returning back to the old habits to be happy. To get out of this loop we need to give ourselves rating from 10 to 1 and 1 means that we at least tried and this way we never are a failure and its just a matter of getting more or less points. Remember that while deciding to change the connection of happiness from the bad habits to good habits we are actually choosing a path and once we choose a path then we are no longer on the old way. I would suggest start visualizing this and then you would feel it is so easy to follow. 

Step 3 is practicing the new habits consciously. Any habit takes time to form therefore replacing a habit also takes a cycle. Our brain is very powerful but its like like wild horse that is jumping around all the time and its hard to train it. We need to understand that its our asset that we need to take care of and our baby that we need to nurture as well. Do not be harsh on yourself and have patience in teaching your brain the right things. Take time and be patient, the more gentle you would be the more calm the brain will become. The more strict you will treat it, the more wilder it will start behaving. Practice every day in the morning or what ever time suits you to calm down and tell your brain the right things. Tell stories to yourself just like we used to do in our childhood (reading loud) and believe me it works and it works very well. 

I will share more insight into this as we move forward. I am also just practicing these things as you are reading this. So there is a lot to come. Be happy with the right connection!

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Moments of Life and Serenity

Moments of Life and Serenity

Beauty of life in all forms. Nature gives us beauty everywhere. It has created everything unique as no two things are same. That means we all are unique so we do not have to copy others all the time to fit in the crowd. We should not loose the beauty of who we are but rather keep the uniqueness that is a gift to us and bring variety to the world.

I Love Myself

I brushed my teeth yesterday night and I am following this ritual for past two weeks now. I always knew it is one good thing to do but never really stick to it most of the time. Why I am doing it now? Did I changed my habit or new year resolution. Simple thing as brushing my teeth every night before going to bed, We call them good habits and never really think that we are caring for our body by doing it.

I started eating well and more consciously and I am enjoying food every time I eat it. Many people already do this but others like me never really care. What changed in me?

I have started loving myself. We all know the saying – ‘Love thyself’, but we hardly ever do that fully. One of the reason that people hurt us. Most of the times we rely on others to give us happiness and make us feel good. Why? Because we don’t give the feeling of love to ourselves. I am 28 and turning 29 next month. Too old to know things in life but still I have never loved myself fully to be complete in myself. The time I broke up with my ex, I started feeling disappointed with the world and specially guys as they always hurt you. But now I know it was not him, it was me. I never loved myself enough to know what I deserve and what shall I choose for myself. We close our eyes and do not want to see whether we really want that person in our life or we are just being desperate to have someone in our life to share our feelings and to make ourselves feel good. If we depend on others for our happiness then it will depend on the other person whether they keep us happy or not.

It is their choice we have no control upon. And don’t you think it is like being a kid again where we used to depend upon our parents to feed us and keep us safe. But now that we are old enough to take care of ourselves physically then still we depend upon others to make us happy. That means we are grown ups physically but not completely emotionally.

I would suggest to have good friends when you think you need some one in life. Because when you are not happy and hurt then no one else can give you the inner joy. Only faith in yourself and finding the inner happiness by doing things that you like is going to make you full of life. Friends help in this process by eliminating the loneliness in you and it will keep you busy with the activities you like rather than being desperate and find another wrong person for your self. Because heart without love cant give love. So first make your heart whole with self love then only is the time to have some one close in your life who will cherish having you in their life. Otherwise you will be needy rather than being in love. People can sense whether you are needy or genuine and even if you get some one nice when you are desperate, there is no surety how long it is going to last.

I am going through the whole self discovery phase at the moment and I feel from my personal experience it is amazing. Its not about what kind of person you want, it is also about whether you deserve the person you want in your life or not. Many times we choose people who want us but they don’t deserve us, this puts us in lower position where we get hurt and loose our confidence. Other times we choose the people whom we want in our life but they deserve better so we either always try to become what they want or have the feeling of guilt.

It is very important that we choose the person with the same energy level as us, specially emotionally. We usually know what attracts us physically but we do not give enough thoughts what is the emotional level of a person. And I don’t think how the person looks ever hurt us. It is always the person inside that makes us feel that we made the wrong choice. It is like buying a car, if you want it for certain purpose but you just buy it on the basis of looks then it is not going to make you happy. That means you are taking a big chance and it can work or it might not.

I know it is difficult to choose a person for yourself then because how do we know the emotional level before knowing him/her too well. Then why not just be friends and not tag it with some other name. And after a while you will know whether this is the right person for you or not. Because problem with getting into relationship is that you can not back out. You just need to break up and that hurts. Whereas as friends you still have your freedom to choose and be yourself. Its the extra layer that we sometimes put to show the other person that we are perfect for them. But as friends we do not need to do that. we can be ourselves and see whether we like each other or not. Because in case we have that extra layer then one day we will show our true self and the other person might or might not be alright with true our-self  And in case we decide to keep that layer for long enough then it is going to suffocate us gradually. Imagine covering our self from a blanket and carrying that every where with us. We will never be able to feel the world properly.

I will keep writing about what I have been thinking and meanwhile you should start your journey for self love as its you who can love you most and no one else.

Living Blind

It was 7:30 AM in the morning and I was walking towards my work place, listening to the meditation music I just downloaded. An idea caught my mind and I got curious to walk with my eyes closed.

I closed my eyes and continued walking for few seconds. A feeling of fear started getting stronger in me. Suddenly I opened my eyes and relief washed my heart making me feel safe and sound. Even when we close our eyes physically then the fear starts taking place. No wonder we are afraid of so many things in life because we have closed our inner eyes and have closed all the doors to spiritual awareness.

I am starting to realise that I am living my life as a blind person. That is why I am worried about future, present and all the things I am not sure about. If you open your spiritual eyes then you can easily see things clearly and where your choices are going to take you in future.

We as human species are gifted to be able to make choices and then we forget that it’s up to us to choose a path that will help us to get to our destination. Just as the visibility reduces in deep water due to the various factors; same is the case in life. We can’t see things in near future because we have so many distractions and obstruction created by us. Emotions like fear, anxiety, and excitement clutter our vision in life. We lose the bigger picture when we start focusing on the nitty gritty of everyday’s things.

It’s like navigation – we need to focus on various roads and streets but every now and then we also need to zoom out the map and see which direction we are heading. In today’s life we do remember to focus on deciding the path to move forward but we hardly remember to step back and see where these paths are going to take us. This is the reason we are in un-wanted situations at times that make us doubt ourselves. I will share more insight about it in the next post as I am going through this journey of self realization these days that is helping me unfold the world slowly.