Why do I travel?

As a human I am gifted with different senses, emotions and witty nature. I was thinking today to write few reasons why do I love travelling. I felt that it’s the basic need for me to feel human and it is something that keeps me in touch of reality. So I am writing the reasons here in my way – Why do I travel?

  • Eyes: I have been gifted with these eyes to see everyday so I want to see what ever this world has to offer. I can choose on my way to close my eyes when I do not want to witness the cruelty of others but I can still look into other’s eyes with compassion and love. I want to express myself to as many people as I can and try to know them better.
  • Skin: We have this amazing ability to feel the touch, I want to feel like a kid again and close my eyes to feel the sensation of touching something different and new everyday. I want to touch the rock in a different country, I want to take sand in my hands and see it getting washed away with water.
  • Ears: I have ears to hear so I want to indulge myself into the music of various kind. I want to hear others to know what they have to say. I want to hear the noise and voice of wildlife creatures. I want to listen to the waves soaring, rivers roaring and wind blowing.
  • Mouth: I want to talk to people from different part of the world. I want to hear how they speak their language and how they pronounce different words. I want to try and speak their language if I can.
  • Lips: I want to smile as much as I can as its the simplest act that can do wonders I feel.
  • Legs: I have been given these legs to be mobile so no reason for me to crib and sit at one place all day. I want to walk around the cities, villages, towns, forests and run in the farms, hike the mountains and drag myself to bed 🙂
  • Tongue:  Why restrict myself from the distinct taste that various cuisines have to offer. I want to immerse myself in the nice aroma of the food all over the world.
  •  Nose: I want to smell the flowers, water, wet soil, farms, food and much more all over the world. 
  • Hands: I want to give a helping hand to someone in need when I travel. I want to shake hands and make new friends. I want to give a hug to someone close to my heart. I want to a gesture of friendliness to strangers.
  • Brain: I want to use it more into creating new ideas, solving problems at hand while travelling. I want to innovate and think new concepts to make every one around happy.
  •  Heart: I want to love myself and others. I want to love nature, love the wildlife, love people. I want to stop being choosy and love unconditionally.
  •  Soul: I want to give peace to my soul. I do not want to bother my soul from the nitty gritty of life but I rather would like to relax and be happy.

 All this happens naturally when I travel. I feel closer to myself and closer to nature when I travel. 

I would summarise it in one line what it means to travel for me – ‘I finally found myself after getting completely lost’. Now that I have found myself I do not want to loose sight of it even for a moment.

I believe that we have been gifted with this beautiful planet that we call Earth. It is so big and full of wonders then why not explore it while we are on this journey of life. Why not get to know how it feels to get up every day and see a new view from the window. Why limit ourselves because the possibilities are limitless. Let’s travel or at least see the world with new eyes and accept ourselves with big and open heart with love, compassion and kindness. You don’t have to travel to far away places to do any of this if that’s what limiting you but you can rather adopt the thinking of a traveller and you will be able to see the same place you walk everyday with new eyes, you will be able to walk to work and will be able to see more, you will be able to explore new parks around the corner, natural resources for your new found happiness. I think you can change the world if you change yourself for good. Use your imagination to create a happy world out there and to do that just create a happy place inside and you will see the world changing outside at the same time.

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Don’t Drink before Diving with Great White Sharks – Bucket-List 2013 Week 5

Finally with a cup of ginger and lemon tea I am gaining my senses back. It’s been quiet a long period I would say since I had left for Adelaide and from a simple weekend away gateway it turned into a roller coaster adventure with a lot of things packed into very few days.

Item Number #23 – Swim with White Sharks and Item Number #10 – Try couch surfing in Australia

Eyeballing the cage

I left for the Airport to complete another item on my bucket list and it was couch surfing and visit one of the 7 new city/town in next 7 months. It was a cloudy day in Adelaide and I was not sure what I will be doing in this part of South Australia looking at the weather. All I had planned was to book a return ticket and arranged to couch surf there. Other than this I had no clue what I am supposed to do in this new place. I am getting used to of this now – going to a new place with no plan and do stuff there accordingly. Only if I knew I will end up encountering a dozen sharks after no sleep and few drinks one of these nights I was about to spend in South Australia. Yes right, it is not a good idea to drink if you are going to dive with great white sharks my dear friends. And this is coming from my personal experience.

I arrived at the place I was supposed to stay and there was a surprise waiting for me there. I realized that I was about to meet few fellow couch surfers and talk all day about life and philosophy and learn a lot of new things today. I didn’t have much sleep the day before the flight so I was a bit tired and cloudy weather seemed perfect to relax and wind down after 16 very busy days of my life (including sailing lesson and attending many social events other than trying to come up with many ideas to finish few bucket list items and not to say full time work with two night time deployments). I was feeling so happy to finally get this weekend for myself. I was at the door of my host in Adelaide and Sebastian, fellow German couch surfer welcomed me in this new place. It was a different feeling to be in this house. Something spiritual about the house and peaceful environment. I felt so happy instantly and started to relish the beauty of this new place with a garden, a pet cat and few chicken in the backyard. The lady who was hosting me wasn’t around so Sebastian, who was also couch surfing there gave me a quick run of the place and offered me some Jasmine tea. It was quiet refreshing. We talked about a lot of things including bin diving or so called dumpster diving. The people here were doing some bin diving which I had no clue what it was so I really enjoyed learning about it. And guess what here is a complete guide about it as well – Dumpster-Dive

Then I met another girl named Ariana, who was living there with the host (lady). She is a brilliant and charming 19 years old Indian girl. I enjoyed my conversation with her about India, social problems in India and a lot more. I already felt that I am going to miss staying here once I am back. Marion, the lady who was hosting me here, also arrived from Victoria as she was gone to attend a retreat and we discussed her experience there. Another couch surfer Nick joined us towards the night. Marion is a great lady and an awesome host. Last year she hosted more than 200 people at her place. Amazing right. Here I was enjoying my first couch surfing experience with such an amazement.

Next day I prepared cheesy egg frittata with Nick for three of use (Nick, Sebastian and myself) as Marion already had her breakfast and Ariana had left for her Art school workshop. And guess what it was the best meal I ate after a while, may be because I was cooking 😉 Anyways I felt home at that place and we started making plans for the day when I started checking about Shark Diving in the area as mentioned by Ariana a day before. I am not sure what came over me and I booked the returned ticket to Port Lincoln in another two house for the dive as it was one of the things on my bucket list. I was lucky when I called the tour company and they say the tour is being operated everyday and there are quiet good chances to see shark these days. Only issue was my return flight was around 6:30 PM and the tour doesn’t usually end till late evening. I was a bit in mess now as I had to be back somehow to be back at work on Monday morning. Here I was sitting in-front of the chair and wanted to bang my head against the wall thinking of my hastiness at times. But any ways I saw this as an opportunity to complete the task on my bucket list and felt quiet enthusiastic and somehow I felt I can make it and things will be alright. So I booked a night in Port Lincoln and early morning (6 AM) tour for cage diving with the great white dangerous sharks. I left Adelaide with a note that if they don’t hear back from me then I might be in some shark’s stomach 😉

I arrived at the hostel where I was staying for the night – YHA. I already started meeting people who were going for the dive or who had done it. I was so excited that I can’t put it into words. I met this group of English guys and had my dinner talking to them about their experience with the sharks and sharing my experience of my bucket list so far. More people joined us and here I was playing different weirdly named card games (one of them was shithead, I wasn’t sure if it was the right name really). I was enjoying the game when everyone started drinking wine and I was offered some as well. I thought for a moment but then joined everyone else. I am not sure what was I thinking really as after few drinks I was not sure how am I going to make it for the early morning departure to the port. And on top of that I agreed to go to the pub with others. Here I was feeling all uneasy with the constant reminder of the tour so I went outside the pub to get some air. The worst was still waiting though. When I wanted to go back the bouncer didn’t allow me in saying that after 1 AM no one is allowed back into the pub. It was one of the most stupid thing I had ever heard whereas the group I came with was still inside. I called a taxi and made my home to get some sleep then. Only when I arrived at the hostel I realized that someone from the group had borrowed my key as they didn’t have their key handy. This was not looking good anymore. Fun time seemed to be over. I had two choices – Try to sleep in the living area in the couch. But then I had to get my key back to check out in the morning. I tried to knock on the door but no one opened the room I was staying. I was already regretting over the decision of drinking tonight. I decided to stay awake till others come back and get my key back to let myself into my room. It was so hard to keep my eyes open. I made my way to the kitchen and made some tea for myself. There was some free food in the fridge and I got some munchies from the shelf to make sure that I am fully awake this night no matter what. It was getting really hard to manage things at this stage now. I was partially awake when after few hours may be around 3 AM when two guys came from the group and asked me what I am doing here. I explained that I do not have the key. They felt sad for me after knowing the whole story and stayed with me in the living room to wait for others to be back so that I can get my key back. I was more assured now that I might be able to make it to the port tomorrow morning.

Finally I got my key around 4 AM and let myself in the room and got ready to sleep for two hours as the tour bus was supposed to be there by 6:30 AM. It was going to be the most ridiculous thing I had ever done I felt. But anyways I was in the flow making my journey more adventurous then it could be I thought. But it was still not that easy. There were many knocks on the door all night as there were quiet a few people drinking from my room and none of them had key. Yes it was a day of loosing key I felt. 6 AM – Someone’s alarm went off. I woke up quickly and saw others getting ready to leave. And I ran after them and realized that they didn’t bother to ask the driver to wait for few minutes. Here I was all ready but had missed my bus. I called the tour company and thankfully they send me another cab. I was finally able to catch the boat.

We all were welcomed with some early morning snacks. And I got introduced to this couple from Perth who were here to celebrate their second anniversary. What a great way to celebrate, although people were making jokes around wife to have a insurance for the husband. I didn’t take much time to drift to deep sleep when we left for a 3 hour journey to Neptune Island for our dive.

Finally some one from the crew woke me up and asked if I can go with the first group. Wow, this was quiet a wake up call now as my stomach was hurting with this bumpy ride till here and I still was suffering from the hangover. Really, Do I look so keen? I felt that it’s better to just go so I accepted to be the part of the first group. And they gave me all the gears to get ready.

It was quiet a relief when I came to know that we do not have to carry cylinder as they had tubes to supply oxygen in the cage. We were soon getting interviewed about how excited we were to see the sharks. To be honest I couldn’t be more dazed doing something like this after a really big night. But I had to smile on the camera no matter what as it was going to be my big moment, if only I survive and not get eaten by any shark interested in me. I finally got into water and felt a surge of excitement in me. My inside diver was coming out full of curiosity. I soon was a normal diver with my brain functioning quiet well now under water. And I started looking for the sharks around. It wasn’t long that we started spotting few of them swimming around. Soon we were a bit shaken in the cage by their excitement to catch the food thrown from the boat. One of them even hit the cage so hard that I had to hold myself back not to swim out the gap in the cage. It was mind blowing to see them so close where I had an eye on the gap as there are stories of small sharks entering the cage through it.

Finally after an hour we went out the cage which was good as I was freezing by then and was done with shark seeing. We had our lunch once we got changed after a shower. I was tired and happy and excited all at the same time. I felt as if I was mesmerized by these beautiful but dangerous creatures. I was so lucky in terms of timing as today it was a small group of people and we got to see shark soon as compared to other days. Hence we headed back way too early – 2 PM. And got back by 4:30 PM and I had enough time to catch my flight back to Adelaide.

With Dan, Skipper

With Dan, Skipper

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Posing with Dani, the host in the tour – she is just awesome 🙂

I am lucky when it comes to meet people I guess as on my way to Airport I got to share the taxi with this another amazing group of Tennis players who shared their experience of traveling around the world and it didn’t let me feel bore on the way to airport or another hour spent there. I was over the moon now after everything was falling in place. When I got back to Adelaide, I went back to the same place I was couch surfing. I met Marion and Sebastian there. I offered to cook some Indian curry and rice. We all shared the meal and it was the perfect way to end this trip really. Next morning my flight was very early (6 AM). Yes, this is early for me usually as I had to be there by 5 AM and that meant I had to get up by 4:30 at least. Marion was so helpful that she offered me lift to the airport in the morning. We enjoyed music – Santana by Carlos Augusto Alves Santana, a Mexican and American musician. I loved it. I was able to catch my flight to Sydney and went to work straight from the airport. I have done it few other times last year so it was OK to see people staring at me thinking I might have lost my way to enter with my big backpack.

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Back in Adelaide airport

So this was my adventure for this weekend. I hope you enjoyed it with me 😉

See you soon with more updates on my bucket list dear friends. Till then have fun 🙂

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Invention of Love

Invention of Love

The title originally chosen for this photo was – ‘Love is in the air – Someone is trying to live & Someone is trying to share’.

But then I wanted to write something relevant about this picture and started thinking about love. What is it all about and how it all started hence I felt that the current title would be more appropriate. As this photo has got five different pics merged into one.

  • The black & white is my experiment trying to capture all the pics of couples in the garden. This made me feel – Love is in the air.
  • Then a girl was enjoying the day sitting in the garden and her red hair attracted my attention. She made me feel that you can love yourself and enjoy the day at times as well.
  • Then third pic is edited in instagram and I took it today. It made me feel that sometimes we want to share the things in life we see with others – We want to share the love.

Today when I merged these different pics then they didn’t look different to me and merged into one emotion – Love. Its everywhere. I sit in the train and see couples, babies with their parents, friends, families. If I close my eyes and think about the good moment in my life then I find myself in love with my life.

I smile while walking on the street after seeing these beautiful emotions. I don’t need a present to be happy. I smile when I see my flatmate who is awesome. I smile when I hear the beautiful lyrics of a song. I smile when I think God is there to take care of me.

Simple but powerful – the nature of love and it can change our life. We don’t need someone else to give it to us. We can love ourselves and give the same love to others. The more we give the more it increases, that’s the beauty of love.

So the message for today is – Love. Think about it and let me know the various things that make you feel this emotion. Let me tell you its very easy to feel this emotion being human.

We could have been the meal of the tiger that day – Lesson: Rice Terraces can be way bigger than they actually look

The lesson from the story seems to be a bit weird when it comes to survival in the jungle, I know. But you would soon realise why this seems more appropriate rather than saying that don’t try the treks that you are not aware of when tigers can be around at the same time.

Sarankot (1610m) – day hike – 5/6 hours from the town called ‘Pokhara’ in Nepal

4th Day in Nepal, we had successfully climbed up this day long hike but one problem was that we started a bit late. It was the day after Shivratri so me and my friend were of course not in the best state of our mind but we had been thinking of being more active and lose some weight in the holidays that we had gained from the various cuisines we already had so far. We anyways got determined to do this trek which didn’t look very threatening looking at our level of fitness and it was around 1 PM when we started. It was very sweaty but still refreshing to get to the top. We took our time to take some nice shots and admired the beauty of the town from there.

 

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I have already posted some really nice pictures that I was able to take the same day of sunset (only that I didn’t mention that it was half an hour before we were getting our new lesson in life https://talkingexperience.wordpress.com/2013/03/24/a-magical-evening-from-nepal/

).

Soon we realised that we have been descending for quite a while via road and it does not seems to take us anywhere near the town hence I pointed out to a trek that was near the road and looked like a short cut. My friend agreed with me and we both started following this trek more quickly than we had thought as the sun was on its way home much too quick. We heard few kids laughing and saying there are tigers in the forest but their tone didn’t seemed to be serious hence we assumed it to be a common joke around the locals.

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Soon we had arrived the rice terraces with no one left around and we are still descending. We could see the town somewhere far away below but it was still a long way to go. Now there was no clear trek so we started jumping one rice paddies at a time. Then we spotted a farmer winding down his day and thought it as a good idea to ask him for the direction. He looked a bit amazed looking at us, two girls, in the middle of nowhere and keen to make our way in this wilderness into the dark. But he anyways pointed out to the right side and said good bye. As usual we obeyed to any guidance provided by this so called only available local expert in this foreign land but soon we realised there was no way that we can go ahead in that direction, else we will end up being in the very dense forest. And if we try to climb down the rice paddies then it was as high as the wall of an average room so there were quite a few chances of breaking our legs in case we jump from there. We thought that we were following the easier trek earlier (before we took the promising direction guidance from the farmer) so we might want to go back (to the left). So we thought of backtracking our way a little and successfully did half of it in one direction. But now there was no staircase like paddies left, all we could see were high walls all around and it was getting harder to imagine ourselves climbing down those with any success to getting close to the city. We scrambled few bushes and tried to follow the water streams between the gaps of two rice terraces vertically but then it was getting dark all too soon.

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Then we made an unsuccessful attempt to cross the rice paddies horizontally via the water stream and got ourselves into a very steep rock soon and back tracked the same to reach the top of the paddy. My friend was brave to say that it’s ok if we have to stay in the forest and back of my mind I started counting the resources we had to stay there – none. No tent, no water, nothing to eat, nothing to cover ourselves and no torch (battery of my mobile was also dying). She was confident to an extent that she was telling me to climb the tree if an animal shows up and here I was not trained in all these traits of climbing trees, living in the forest with nothing. Ouch, I felt a bit scared and my mind started racing to find a way out. I asked her if she is ok to back track the way up and go back to the street from where we descended at least that way we will be close to civilization and will be able to get a ride home if nothing. Thankfully she agreed and my heartbeat got a bit normal. Then next challenging task was to lead the way and I volunteer to do that. Soon I felt as if I had eyes of a cat (people used to say that I had catlike eyes – hazel), but joke apart, It really helped because I was able to see my way in very dim light from the moon.

Finally after 30 minutes of struggle we were able to see few people sitting near the farm. I can’t explain how relaxing it was as if we found the lost treasure there. Now I was more hopeful thinking that we would definitely be safe and alive now. But there you go, a guy from the group said that he can help us to go back to the same rice paddies and show us the proper track that we have just missed. This was not happening, as it was really dangerous to go back but he tempted us with the time it would have taken to get home through this short cut. And a moment later we were following him through the same path. Annoying – yes it was at that time but survival was more necessary than any other emotion at that point of time. My friend snapped at him once as well when he started doing the small talk by asking where she is from. She replied – ‘How does it matter at this time?’ and it was true we were there stuck in the middle of nowhere and not at all in the mood of this kind of conversation. But after a while we became more relaxed as we realized that he knew where he was taking us. My phone was of some help with the light to show us the way as well.

But the happiness of being found didn’t last too long. There it was – he said it. He started telling us that there is a tiger or may be a few in that forest and he even confirmed the path we had taken after being guided by the farmer few hours ago was where they saw the tiger few days ago. I gulped and didn’t know how to react. I was not sure to look ahead or look back to make sure no tiger is following me. Not that I would say that I am afraid of dying. But at least I wanted to be ready. My friend wanted me to take her picture looking into the eyes of tiger in case she encounters such situation and put it on Facebook (lol). But now that looked like a really bad joke when in the dark I was not sure where to look for this dangerous creature. It was not even like going into a national park to spot one…here we were not willing but still in risk of seeing one in the middle of nowhere. I wanted to shout or cry not sure what but I had to man up and focus on the way.

Soon when we were just able to gather our calm and cool again he threw another piece of information on us about a Japanese girl who got lost there like this almost a year ago. I was expected some kind of horror story now. But thank God it was alright. He told us that she gave him a lot of money to save her life, not that he fought with the tiger and all. But it was when we were ready to follow the track at our own when he asked if he can stay with us. Now that was awkward. We told him that we can give him money but he should find his way back home after that. There was a little discussion now on this as I preached this guy about morality and pointed out that we are happy to pay for what he is doing for us and we really appreciate his help. We realised that he was more risky to be around than the tiger then we decided to pay him money and track our way back home from there. We did that and finally got to the main road and took a deep breath. Our first reaction was a little shock realizing that we are safe and alive but we had a laugh soon when we started walking in the middle of road and my friend said that it would look very bad if after surviving through the forest we got hit by a car there.

We stopped for dinner on the way home in a nice looking restaurant, not that we were looking very good to enter there but we stopped anyways. We really needed some good food after no lunch all day (just late breakfast) and all this adventure. I liked a quote from my friend that we should be really good friends that we didn’t fight during this crises today. I really felt relaxed after all this and the meal tasted as if I never had that good a meal in my life. It was a meal after you just got another chance to live 😉 Now I think I am exaggerating it.

Thanks for reading dear friend. It was one of the experiences I will always remember and I am glad that you lived it with me again.

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Hawaii – Day 1 (Started with a stranger and ended up with bunch of friends)

I made it just in time and it was first time I suppose that I did not have to wait in the queue and got myself checked in quickly. As usual I was travelling with my backpack that makes for the carry on as per its weight (less than 8 Kilogram). Now had to grab some snacks before my flight as it was 6 PM and I didn’t want to end up eating something in the flight that I might not like.  Thats it, plane is flying to Honolulu, Hawaii finally. My holidays started and I am more than relaxed thinking about it. My co-passenger is a girl and we have the seats at the very back of the plane. It’s the first time I was sitting this close to the toilet. Although it was not that bad as I was thinking. Rachel, the girl sitting next to me started talking to me and we had an initial introduction. Not sure it is the usual me or the travelling thing as I went on and on with her and we discussed a lot of things, enough to be friends in future. Also we shared some snacks in the seat between us where fortunately no one was sitting. It was really cool to meet her as we didn’t feel that we were travelling on our own as we couldn’t stop giggling. And than we watched a movie on her laptop with shared pair of headphone. Overall we both cherished the experience we had and start planning to hang out in Honolulu as she was staying there for 3 night. coincidentally we both were staying in the same place so that was easy. We both caught the bus to our place. Shuttle bus is 13 USD since the regular bus is 2.5 USD and you can reach almost all the places in Honolulu. So you can choose the option accordingly.

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I was staying in ‘Hokondo Waikiki Beachside Hostel’. The staff is very friendly there and they helped us with our backpacks by storing them for us, when we reached there early (directly from the Airport).  It was only then when I realized that my card was not working. New travel card that wasn’t activated yet which was very embarrassing. But the people in the backpacker were friendly and let me check in while I was checking with my bank about the issue. Meanwhile we headed to the beach when I realized it will take few hours to resolve. And there it was the most breathtaking view of the day – beach. Crystal clear blue water..just the most awesome feeling I had that time. We soon jumped into the water for a swim. It took some time before I was able to sort out the issue with my travel money card. Tip – If you are going to buy the travel money card for travelling then do register and check the status and all online to make sure it’s activated by bank as in my case they had forgotten to do so. Finally I checked into my room and met my new roommates including Rachel (girl from the flight). Now it was time to socialize in new place. Fortunately all my roommates (few were missing from the room) were very good and friendly so I didn’t have much trouble making friends. After few hours we headed to get some good food.

Time in Hawaii is 10 hours behind Sydney which makes the next day also 31st January (same day I flew for Hawaii). It is cool as it feels like you have time traveled into the past. You keep thinking that it should be the next day but time wise it is not. It took me a while to get the confusion of date and time out of my system.

We had dinner in Lu-Lu’s, a famous bar and restaurant among backpackers and they have special Tuesday nights in Waikiki beach with 10 USD entry fees. You can go there before 9 PM and get the band for yourself for free and then you don’t have to pay the entry fees when you enter after 9 PM. Few friends of mine did this. I was too busy hanging out with other sets of friends to carry out this. But any ways we had dinner with blue Hawaii cocktail and Pina Colada.

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Then after returning to the hostel our new roommate shared some very funny and interesting stories of his friends which made it even more fun. A new girl came to share the room by now (we were in the 8 people room, two rooms each with 4 beds). She joined in the discussion and we just loved the evening. After few more drinks we bid goodnight and had a peaceful and relaxing night.

I Love Myself

I brushed my teeth yesterday night and I am following this ritual for past two weeks now. I always knew it is one good thing to do but never really stick to it most of the time. Why I am doing it now? Did I changed my habit or new year resolution. Simple thing as brushing my teeth every night before going to bed, We call them good habits and never really think that we are caring for our body by doing it.

I started eating well and more consciously and I am enjoying food every time I eat it. Many people already do this but others like me never really care. What changed in me?

I have started loving myself. We all know the saying – ‘Love thyself’, but we hardly ever do that fully. One of the reason that people hurt us. Most of the times we rely on others to give us happiness and make us feel good. Why? Because we don’t give the feeling of love to ourselves. I am 28 and turning 29 next month. Too old to know things in life but still I have never loved myself fully to be complete in myself. The time I broke up with my ex, I started feeling disappointed with the world and specially guys as they always hurt you. But now I know it was not him, it was me. I never loved myself enough to know what I deserve and what shall I choose for myself. We close our eyes and do not want to see whether we really want that person in our life or we are just being desperate to have someone in our life to share our feelings and to make ourselves feel good. If we depend on others for our happiness then it will depend on the other person whether they keep us happy or not.

It is their choice we have no control upon. And don’t you think it is like being a kid again where we used to depend upon our parents to feed us and keep us safe. But now that we are old enough to take care of ourselves physically then still we depend upon others to make us happy. That means we are grown ups physically but not completely emotionally.

I would suggest to have good friends when you think you need some one in life. Because when you are not happy and hurt then no one else can give you the inner joy. Only faith in yourself and finding the inner happiness by doing things that you like is going to make you full of life. Friends help in this process by eliminating the loneliness in you and it will keep you busy with the activities you like rather than being desperate and find another wrong person for your self. Because heart without love cant give love. So first make your heart whole with self love then only is the time to have some one close in your life who will cherish having you in their life. Otherwise you will be needy rather than being in love. People can sense whether you are needy or genuine and even if you get some one nice when you are desperate, there is no surety how long it is going to last.

I am going through the whole self discovery phase at the moment and I feel from my personal experience it is amazing. Its not about what kind of person you want, it is also about whether you deserve the person you want in your life or not. Many times we choose people who want us but they don’t deserve us, this puts us in lower position where we get hurt and loose our confidence. Other times we choose the people whom we want in our life but they deserve better so we either always try to become what they want or have the feeling of guilt.

It is very important that we choose the person with the same energy level as us, specially emotionally. We usually know what attracts us physically but we do not give enough thoughts what is the emotional level of a person. And I don’t think how the person looks ever hurt us. It is always the person inside that makes us feel that we made the wrong choice. It is like buying a car, if you want it for certain purpose but you just buy it on the basis of looks then it is not going to make you happy. That means you are taking a big chance and it can work or it might not.

I know it is difficult to choose a person for yourself then because how do we know the emotional level before knowing him/her too well. Then why not just be friends and not tag it with some other name. And after a while you will know whether this is the right person for you or not. Because problem with getting into relationship is that you can not back out. You just need to break up and that hurts. Whereas as friends you still have your freedom to choose and be yourself. Its the extra layer that we sometimes put to show the other person that we are perfect for them. But as friends we do not need to do that. we can be ourselves and see whether we like each other or not. Because in case we have that extra layer then one day we will show our true self and the other person might or might not be alright with true our-self  And in case we decide to keep that layer for long enough then it is going to suffocate us gradually. Imagine covering our self from a blanket and carrying that every where with us. We will never be able to feel the world properly.

I will keep writing about what I have been thinking and meanwhile you should start your journey for self love as its you who can love you most and no one else.